"I'm gonna fill his love tank!"

And so it begins...

Two Brothers: First time in the Costco cart together

I asked you both to smile and this is what you did.

Good Morning, Boys

Mother's Day 2013

A Mama of Two.

 {Jeremy had to work but came home with a Vegan strawberry shortcake for this dairy-free Mama}

{Kveller surprised me with the Smitten Kitchen cookbook off of my wish list and I made (and ate) this broccoli slaw the very same day}

Too Much Love

"Owen please don't lay on Gillen, he can't do a push up with you on his back. 

Too much love, buddy. Too much love!"

Hippie babies

We got out Owen's old Amber teething necklace for Gillen. Owen didn't remember that it used to be his but he was quite upset that Gil had a necklace and he did not. So I found one second hand for Owen to have and now each morning Owen insits on wearing matching necklaces.

I don't know if it actually helps with teething and it's hard to tell because Gil is so laid back but regardless, it's pretty adorable.

19 Weeks: Brothers play

It's been so dark in the house I have a hard time capturing the boys playing. These pictures are not the best, but they show an adorable interaction between my little guys. Gillen was sitting up playing with his toy and Owen brought over the tunnel. Gil waited patiently for Owen to pop through and then Owen grabbed Gil's toy for him that he had dropped. The last photo isn't in focus but I think Gil's face is hilarious!

"So... apparently this guy doesn't wear pants anymore!?"

More Brothers Bath!

BIG. RED.

Brothers Matching Shirts!

Gillen 17 weeks | Owen 34 months

Good Morning, Boys!

There is a theme going with pictures of these boys. 

Owen = LOTS of enthusiasm; Gil =What the hell?

Gillen 16 weeks old

Chanukah: Two Candles

The boys woke up in the morning and played blocks together. We put Gillen in the bumbo for the first time and he absolutely loved it. He's both strong and fat so he easily sat up and watched his brother play blocks. Owen gave him one to chew on and it was pretty adorable seeing how interested Gillen is in everything O does. The shot of the two of them, I couldn't get Owen to stand still so his face is blurry, but it's too cute not to post ;)

 

Tonight Owen opened up a dicast toy airplane and a soccer ball. He has been asking for a soccer ball for a while now so he was SO HAPPY! (We ended up having to take it away after several near-misses to Gillen's head, but we'll try again tomorrow.)

Gillen: 12 weeks old

and still a complete and total joy, for all of us. 

31 Months: Owen, My Great Love

Dearest Owen,

The day I left for the hospital to have your brother you were still my baby. I cradled you in my arms and kissed your soft cheeks. The moment he was born, he was the baby and you were --bigger. You were so big, and tall and grown when I saw you next. I left to have a baby and you grew into a big brother overnight. Your suntanned legs, complete with scrapes. Your tasseled hair and rose-colored cheeks. Your ability to talk from sun-up to sunset. Little to no resemblance of baby left in you, it was only in the way that I saw you. As if you had never changed from the moment I met you and now somehow you've grown leaps and bounds in an instant. But in reality everything is the same, I'm just learning to see my two children. A baby and a boy. Brothers. My greatest accomplishments.

All of my tears since the birth of your brother have been for you. I know the insides and out of your gentle spirit. I know that you are struggling as a try to know him too. It all must seem so unfair. You've shown me in your own sensitive way just how much you miss being the center of my universe. How having my divided attention is not the same as having it all. It's hard on me too. I miss the days I lived to make you smile. And this face in the picture is one I see more often than not right now. You've always known your place in our family and it pains me to see you struggle to find where you fit again. I'm trying to be gentle and mindful of how the world must look to you now. How hard it must be for you. I guess we're both trying to be patient with each other. 

You have been so sweet to your brother. Every morning when I come into your room you ask, "What is baby Gil doing?" and later in the day you ask me when we're bringing him back to the hospital. I tell you he's here to stay. You ask again the next day, just to be sure. When he coos you tell me he is making "butterfly noises" and I cannot think of a more perfect way to describe it. You've been incredibly patient and you've found your special place tucked up next to me while I nurse him. Books have allowed me to tend to you while feeding him. You ask when he can play with you, I assure you that one day he will. Until then, you show him your favorite trucks and you kiss his head. You occasionally throw a cup at his bouncer or put a stuffed toy on his face while he's sleeping. We're working on it.

I already know how to love and care for a newborn, you taught me that. I'm still figuring out what a two and a half year old needs from me. You will always be my test subject for parenthood and I apologize for all my stumbles and imperfection. But one thing will never change, you will always be my first. You are my Great Love. At night when your brother is asleep, I come into your room. I cover you up and push the hair from your face. I want to climb into your crib and hold you close. I want you to know how much you matter. How hard I am trying to make this work. When you are sleeping, you're not pushing back. You are my baby again. I love you so much it hurts and giving you a brother, while it seems so unjust at the moment, is a gift I know you'll come to cherish. You will be his Great Love, too. He will want nothing more than to be like you, play with you, follow your every move and word. Time will wash away your memories of just the three of us, but I will always have them. I will keep them tucked inside my heart and I'll share them with you when ever you want. But I'll also let you forget. I'll let you forget so that you can learn to share my love and be a big brother. Because one day soon, playing with him will bring you more joy than playing with me. I've given you a partner in crime, a roommate and a buddy. You loving each other will be the ultimate reward, for all of us.

You made me a Mama, you changed every fiber of my being for the better. I'll love you harder, to make it easier and we'll find our new us soon. The four of us. A Mama, a Daddy, a boy and a baby. My beautiful family.

Owen, I love you more than all of the stars in the sky and I'll remind you if ever you forget it.

Mama

Two Weeks Old

12 Hours Later: Gillen Meets His Big Brother

Seeing my firstborn looking so big, brought me to tears. 

Owen stayed overnight with our neighbors and they helped him make Gillen a card from his big brother. Owen also brought him a monkey (Gillen smiled ;))

Sweet red-headed boy is eating like a champ.
God couldn't have sent a more perfect match for our little family.