Monday, November 23, 2009

The day when $0.97 saved my marriage

I think I've mentioned on several occasions that my boobs now have their own zip code. If it offends you to read about boobs, please stop now. If you are related to me and it makes you uncomfortable to read about MY boobs, you can stop now or get over it because you've probably met me before and know that I'm a health educator and will probably have my child saying UTERUS by the age of two.

So my baby feeders are kicking into action at a rapid pace, faster than my Victoria Secret slings can keep up with. Two weeks ago, I found a GLORIOUS SALE RACK of $12.99 bras and bought the next size up.

Those lasted me exactly two weeks.

But because I cannot possibly imagine buying new undergarments EVERY TWO WEEKS I've been suffering in silence. Except for when I complain to my husband.

This weekend he noticed a rash on my side because of the elastic digging in and decided I needed a boulder holder intervention. We went to the maternity store and attempted to buy some nursing bra's to which he replied,"Those fit like crap." Innocent comment resulted in an irrational pregnancy-hormone-induced TIZZY and to which I replied, "This is why I buy expensive bra's from Victoria's Secret!" (followed by some incoherent mumbling about someone being a bra judger and me hating my jugs and wishing I could win the lottery or at least some seed money so that I could invent nicer nursing bras - I think you get the picture.)

Sans pregnancy, I'm not small chested. I have gifted mammaries and although I've often swooned over cute little push up bras with ONE CLASP - I'm just not a ONE CLASP KIND OF GIRL. Jeremy suggested we try Vicki's and even offered to pay full price (WHAT?) for some bigger support (and mental stability). No luck. No nursing bras and apparently they don't even sell bra extenders.

So I proceeded to have a nervous break down in the food court over mediocre food and my pregnancy breasts. I was in fact, so incredibly inconsolable that I needed to go home and sit quietly by myself (yes, even grown women need time-out).

And then my husband mysteriously left for a half hour and returned with this from Walmart.

And for less than ONE DOLLAR I was able to deal with my life and marriage again.

AMEN.

4 comments:

  1. also, you might try a medela sleep bra in a little bit bigger than usual size - they are super comfy and will suit you in good stead come the nursing days - mroe bang for your buck!

    and, thanks for coming over to my place! :-p I'm glad you're not scared of me :)

    and i really couldn't recommend baby brains enough :) we got it from the library on a whim when boyo was a wee lad and then immediately put it on his christmas list because it was too cute NOT to own :)

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  2. Destination Maternaty has an online store. Buy your bra a size up from what you are now. And don't get any molded cups. Get the cotton kind. They stretch better. And get more than 5. Cause they wear out pretty quickly. I bought the cheaper ones and they've lasted me. My friend and I were talking about it one day and she has 4 kids and has bought the cheap ones and the expensive ones and everything in between and she said she hasn't found much of a difference in any of them.

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  3. I had these too, and they saved my life. :) Thank goodness for them!

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  4. Loved this post. Made me smile, although I can not fully relate, I can imagine the frustration... I have it with just finding a normal bra :)

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