Happy Friday!

{source: me}

I'm playing around with some design ideas --I'm contemplating an Etsy shop. 

What do you think?

Little things

Sometimes I get swallowed up in the day-to-day----wake, nurse, change diapers, laundry, dinner, litter box, shower (meh.), browse the internet, pump, drink water, miss husband, snuggle baby - rinse and repeat. I remember at my old job we had a very multicultural office and one of the researchers there was Chinese. She would sometimes ask our administrative assistant, Julia, questions (very valid questions) about idiomatic expressions. Nine times out of ten, she would stump her, (ie. "Come on, guys" - how do you possibly explain this??) It tickled me when she would ask these questions - because Julia with her firey red hair and personality to match - was of course the BEST person to ask (I borrowed her black leather fringed motorcycle chaps for Halloween one year. She actually had the guts to wear them in real life.) I would hoover in my cubical very silently in an effort to eavesdrop on these conversations. I found them fascinating and would laugh to myself at how truly confusing the English language really is.

One day my coworker asked a question that I'll always keep with me.

What is, "a little something" ?

Julia sat puzzled, "What is the context?"

Someone said they were having, "a little something special"

And I listened to Julia fumble through an explanation of how when something, even a very small thing like a cup of coffee, a fancy sugar sifter or a green highlighter, makes us happy we save it (for a rainy day...what?) and enjoy it when we need a pick-me-up (pick me up? what?)

I thought about all of the "little somethings" that make my heart flutter and how the bad stuff just melts away. I remember the first time I fell in love with a little something. I was in college, driving down the main street of our small town around this very time of year. There were workers on ladders putting flags at the very top of the black light posts that lined the leaf-covered street. I looked up at the new flag whipping in the wind and on it was a snowflake. I rolled down my window and took a deep breath of cool air, I could almost smell the snowflakes --and in that moment, my heart smiled a little. I made a memory of that feeling, to keep with me as a reminder that THIS is what getting older is all about. You might say this was the first time that I stopped to just be thankful.

Ever since that day I let myself be taken away, to those moments, by a little something specials. To truly appreciate little things in my life that make my heart swell big inside my chest. The feeling that smiles so big on the inside it can't help but make you smile on the outside.

The other day a friend called, kids screaming in the background and said she was having the worst day ever, and then she said, "But Trader Joes had a big bunch of fresh flowers for $3 today. They are sitting on my dining room table, making everything better."  And I told her about my spoons. There is a frozen yogurt shop down the street with 12 machines of daily flavors. You fill up a large white cup and cover the creamy goodness with nuts, candy, fruit and cereals of your choosing. You pay by the ounce (so pick light toppings!) and shovel it in with a brightly colored plastic spoon. This summer, when Jeremy happened to get home early enough, our little family would walk to the shop. We'd see who could guess the weight of the yogurt, we'd talk, coo over Owen and enjoy the sweetness of the night. I couldn't bring myself to throw away the spoons, so into the dishwasher they went one by one, until I had a set.

When I pull myself, bleary-eyed, out of bed to nurse a crying Owen in the middle of the night or very early in the morning before the sun comes up I always eat a small cup of soy yogurt before going back to bed (must.make.more.milk) and I eat it with a brightly colored spoon. And I stand alone, barefoot in the dark kitchen and let that spoon bring me back to a perfect summer night walking hand-in-hand with my gorgeous husband and cuddling our tiny baby.

The diapers, the laundry, the dinner, the litter box  and every other day-to-day is easier to swallow served up on a colored spoon. My little something special.

People Change

Before I was a Mama I carried a purse and I honestly cannot remember what I filled it with because since becoming a Mama, I keep my wallet tucked in the diaper bag along with my chap stick and my keys.

Before I was a Mama I wore perfume, now I prefer to smell like my baby, like milk and his sweaty little body pressed against me when he falls asleep.

Before I was a Mama I would have my wedding ring cleaned once a month. I wanted this gorgeous gift from my husband to sparkle like the sun whenever I looked at it. My ring is caked with butt paste and sweet potatoes, but now I have an even more precious gift from my husband that I've been staring at for the last eight months.

Before I was a Mama I went to Vegas twice a year - now I go to baby play group twice a week.

Before I was a Mama I would have never left the house without mascara on, now I ask myself how many days its been since I showered when I'm pulling out of the driveway.

Before I was a Mama I got up and went to work everyday, now I work harder than I ever have in my life and some days I don't even leave the house.

Before I was a Mama I thought I needed 8 full hours of sleep to function, now I know 2.5 consecutive hours can feel like eternity.

Before I was a Mama, every night was date night with my husband and now microwaving smores and passing out on the couch counts as quality time spent together.

Before I was a Mama I could not wait to read my US Weekly magazine every Friday, now I read parenting books, and recipe books and I haven't picked up a magazine all year.

Before I was a Mama I would clean my house for days before anyone was allowed to visit, last week I let a new friend come inside even though I had breakfast dishes on the coffee table and unfolded laundry piled on the couch.

Before I was a Mama I would sometimes get frustrated because my boobs were too big to wear the cute polka dot bras at Victoria's Secret, now - I wear a bra with four clasps, flaps over the nipples and padding on the strap and its my favorite bra.

Before I was a Mama I ate my meals at the dinner table, now I eat them standing up while I'm doing something else. I ate a bagel in the bathroom this morning and finished chewing it while I was washing my hair in the shower.

Before I was a Mama I hated doing laundry, now I absolutely, positively HATE doing laundry.

Before I was a Mama I thought I knew what it felt like to love someone with your whole heart, now I know exactly what it feels like.

And I wouldn't change a single thing.

Public Health NO NO

I should know better, I really should. But who can resist fruit pizza? Apparently, not me. We were invited to two (TWO!) 4th of July BBQ's this past weekend (both invites made through mommy groups, I rock at making friends). For the Sunday affair, I decided to be festive and make a flag-themed fruit pizza (and rushed out the door without taking a picture of it's awesomeness...) We had a great time at the party, Mr. Owen was a sweaty mess but loves to be social and LOVES to watch other kids play. The host insisted we take food home (the same food that sat out in 90 degree heat for 3+ hours), so I loaded up my tray and brought it home and PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE. I. AM. AN IDIOT.

Of course I thought nothing of it when I had another slice (or four) of my delishISH fruit pizza for lunch on Monday.

...Until Tuesday morning at 1am when I was BARFING MY BLOODY BRAINS OUT.

My first thought... Oh shit, I'M PREGNANT!! And you can imagine my relief when a few hours later it started to come out both ends (relief? What?)

(Side note: I definitely want to have another child one day. But not today or any day soon. I need to figure out this child first. And I swear having a baby is the best form of birth control EVER. I've never in my life been more terrified of getting pregnant... and I pretty much have the cutest baby on the planet. Nuff Said.)

Jeremy wakes up to go to work at 4am and finds me rushing to the toilet (for the third time that morning). I walked him out to the kitchen to say goodbye, AND FILLED THE SINK. It was bad, very very bad. Did I mention we don't have a garbage disposal? Right, mega gross. Needless to say this was one of my most challenging days as stay-at-home Mamma yet. Owen is going through a growth spurt right now and trying to master rolling over. As a result, he has been waking every 1-3 hours during the night to eat. During the day he eats about every 1-2 hours. Right. A LOT OF EATING. So with a cranky baby and a dehydrated, pooh-barfing Mamma - I did what any other reasonable woman in my situation would do.

I let my 4 month old son watch TV.

And he loved it.

And I spent the afternoon running back and forth to the bathroom and trying to drink enough fluids to make milk (and not pass out). Finally around 3pm I started to spike fever and I felt like my body was about to collapse... and Jeremy came home early from work with some Gatorade and an anti-nausea prescription. THANK GOD FOR THIS MAN. That prescription was by far the first perk of being a doctor's resident's wife, I only had to VOM for 14 straight hours instead of 24. SCORE.

Owen also gave me a present and slept through the night. The first 7-hr stretch of sleep I've gotten since his birth and went I woke up, I felt awesome - until I realized my chest was about to explode. And I promptly woke my son for a morning milk buffet.

Today I'm barely eating solids and my stomach still feels like I swallowed a mouse trap but at least I made it through. I'm alive, my baby is alive (and could probably tell you the score of Tuesday's FIFA soccer game) and I will NEVER eat bacteria-laden goodies again. EVER.

The end.

(p.s. We had hired a babysitter for Tuesday night to stay with O while we went out for crab for our Anniversary... needless to say... that didn't happen. Ah, life.)

There once was a boy who loved a girl

and he took that girl on vacation to tour the west coast. They visited the town where he grew up. They toured gardens in British Columbia and wineries in Washington and Oregon. One night before dinner they headed up to the highest point overlooking a beautiful beach where they rode banana bikes earlier that day. They were all alone up there and the boy wanted to take a picture. He set up the tripod, and the girl waited for him to rush back into position and smile.

But nothing happened.

Until this happened.



and the first thing she said was, "Are you SERIOUS?!"

and the second thing she said was, "YES!" a million times over.



And they lived happily ever after.

Unemployment Rocks

As of 5pm today, I am officially unemployed.

This is my job.





And I gotta say, its the best damn job I've ever had.

Mamma's got a brand new do!

After weeks of prying massive amounts of my hair out of Owens tiny, sweaty hands and the fast and furious arrival of summer in our new apartment SANS CENTRAL AIR (thermostat currently reads 81 degrees and the window unit is cursing us), I broke down and cut off my hair. Well, I didn't do it myself (although I've contemplated it over the past few weeks) - the girl who registered us at the Jewish Community Center had a SUPER cute hairstyle so I when she said, "Is there anything else I can help you with?" I asked who cuts her hair. She referred me to an adorable little salon with five chairs less than 3 miles from our house.

I didn't bring a single picture of a random celebrity.

I didn't cry in the car on the way there.

I didn't micromanage while she snipped an enormous pile of my beloved red locks.

I simply said, "I had a baby 4 months ago and my apartment doesn't have A/C. I need something cute and easy... and I don't want to look like frumpy soccer mom."

I didn't even spend the entire car ride home looking at my hair in the rear view mirror and crying. AND I didn't rush home to wash and style it myself.

And when I walked in the door feeling like I left half of my sole to be swept up to tossed away, my sweet husband's face beamed with an enormous SMILE and he said,

I love it - it makes you look young and hip. I just love it.

Owen agreed.