Eat at MOMS

I have calmed and quieted my soul,
like a child quieted at its mother's breast;
like a child that is quieted is my soul.
O Israel, hope in the Lord
from this time forth and for evermore.
-Psalm 131

Our pediatrician called with Owen's blood work and it indicated he was malnourished. I guess he wasn't able to drain my breasts through the nipple shield, even though he would "eat" for nearly two hours at a time. There always seemed to be some milk in the cup so I had no idea he wasn't getting enough. And when he was finally starving he rejected the shield. Owen was sleeping all day for two days before our Dr. visit and we thought he was just tired. Nope. Starving. Our pediatrician said he may not have had enough energy/muscle tone to lift his head and push up with his arms during tummy time. Also might explain why he was so fussy over the last month.

I have been a mess since his doctor last week. This was an awful thing and I felt solely responsible for it. My heart broke at the thought of him being hungry all the time and then just giving up and sleeping when he couldn't satisfy himself.

I was sad, and felt guilty but was not ready to give up on what I believe is best for my son. I am happy to report that Owen and I are working our way back. With the stress and the shield, my milk supply was very low - but thankfully I had been pumping and storing milk since week one. Owen is latching now and doing well. I pump after each feeding to stimulate supply. I take 3 Fenugreek pills 3 times a day, got some rest and have been drinking TONS of water. Our pediatrician wanted to supplement with formula, but since we had a small supply of my milk in the fridge and agreed to call in weights she agreed to let us try our method.

We bought an infant scale and we weight Owen before and after he eats (same clothes, no diaper changes) to determine how much he ate. He needs ~ 30 ounces per day so we're making sure he has a minimum of 4 ounces per feeding. If he doesn't get it from me, we give him a bottle to finish it out. At first we were force feeding our poor boy - but now he's increased his stomach capacity and taking 4 ounces per feeding like a champ!

This morning I woke up engorged - I fed Owen FOUR FULL OUNCES on my own!! Then three hours later - again he ate FOUR ounces from me AND I pumped an additional 1.5 ounces! The best news of all is after a week of diligently feeding our cub - HE GAINED ONE POUND. As of this morning he weighed 10 lbs. 11 ounces.

Jeremy was so supportive of all this and I could not have done it without him. He cheered us on, helped Owen latch, bottle feed him and supported me through my ups and downs. He was just as crushed as I was when we set Owen on the scale last week and even more so when the doctor called with the blood work confirming it. He has been so strong with all that is going on and packed up our home and arranged our entire move himself. He made sure that my sole responsibility over the last week was feeding Owen.

These are all such good things. All of this in addition to news that there wasn't an underlying thyroid function problem with Owen and thankfully we are blessed with a versatile baby who has no problem going from breast to bottle and back again.

Breastfeeding was and is so important to me and although it has been one of hardest things I've ever done in my life, and I considered giving up on more than one occasion - for the first time I feel like the two of us are succeeding. Be on the look out for a more confident Mamma toting a little red-headed boy with some serious chubs.